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Well, This Is Exhausting: Essays

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Named a Best Book of the Month by Vogue, Good Morning America, Bustle, Fortune, Goodreads, and more! From Bustle columnist and Twitter sensation Sophia Benoit, this “charming and often laugh-out-loud funny” (Vogue) memoir-in-essays explores the ins and outs of modern womanhood—from finding feminism, the power of pop culture, and how to navigate life’s constant double stand Named a Best Book of the Month by Vogue, Good Morning America, Bustle, Fortune, Goodreads, and more! From Bustle columnist and Twitter sensation Sophia Benoit, this “charming and often laugh-out-loud funny” (Vogue) memoir-in-essays explores the ins and outs of modern womanhood—from finding feminism, the power of pop culture, and how to navigate life’s constant double standards—perfect for fans of Shrill and PEN15. Like so many women, Sophia spent her formative years struggling to do the “right” thing—to make others comfortable, to take minimal and calculated risks, to live up to society’s expectations—only to realize that there was so little payoff to this tiresome balancing act. She spends her childhood in Missouri navigating her parents’ divorce and helping care for her younger siblings, always remaining reliable and responsible. She heads off to college having completely missed her change at a carefree youth. Tired of trying so hard, Sophia finally lets go of the crushing pressure to be perfect. She navigates the highs and lows of the dating world (high: being a beta tester for Bumble; low: hastily shaving her legs before a hotel hookup and getting blood all over the sheets), and walks the line between being a “chill” girl and making sure her boyfriend’s nonchalance about altitude sickness doesn’t get him killed. She learns what it means to be a feminist, how to embrace her own voice, and when to listen to women who have been through more and have been doing the work longer. With varied and laugh-out-loud funny topics ranging from how to be the life of the party (even when you have crippling anxiety), to an ill-fated consultation with a dietician who deems Sophia’s overindulgence in ketchup a serious health risk, to a masterful argument for why no one should judge you for having an encyclopedic knowledge of reality TV, Well, This is Exhausting explores what it means to care too much and try too hard, while maintaining a sense of humor about the absurdity of it all.


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Named a Best Book of the Month by Vogue, Good Morning America, Bustle, Fortune, Goodreads, and more! From Bustle columnist and Twitter sensation Sophia Benoit, this “charming and often laugh-out-loud funny” (Vogue) memoir-in-essays explores the ins and outs of modern womanhood—from finding feminism, the power of pop culture, and how to navigate life’s constant double stand Named a Best Book of the Month by Vogue, Good Morning America, Bustle, Fortune, Goodreads, and more! From Bustle columnist and Twitter sensation Sophia Benoit, this “charming and often laugh-out-loud funny” (Vogue) memoir-in-essays explores the ins and outs of modern womanhood—from finding feminism, the power of pop culture, and how to navigate life’s constant double standards—perfect for fans of Shrill and PEN15. Like so many women, Sophia spent her formative years struggling to do the “right” thing—to make others comfortable, to take minimal and calculated risks, to live up to society’s expectations—only to realize that there was so little payoff to this tiresome balancing act. She spends her childhood in Missouri navigating her parents’ divorce and helping care for her younger siblings, always remaining reliable and responsible. She heads off to college having completely missed her change at a carefree youth. Tired of trying so hard, Sophia finally lets go of the crushing pressure to be perfect. She navigates the highs and lows of the dating world (high: being a beta tester for Bumble; low: hastily shaving her legs before a hotel hookup and getting blood all over the sheets), and walks the line between being a “chill” girl and making sure her boyfriend’s nonchalance about altitude sickness doesn’t get him killed. She learns what it means to be a feminist, how to embrace her own voice, and when to listen to women who have been through more and have been doing the work longer. With varied and laugh-out-loud funny topics ranging from how to be the life of the party (even when you have crippling anxiety), to an ill-fated consultation with a dietician who deems Sophia’s overindulgence in ketchup a serious health risk, to a masterful argument for why no one should judge you for having an encyclopedic knowledge of reality TV, Well, This is Exhausting explores what it means to care too much and try too hard, while maintaining a sense of humor about the absurdity of it all.

30 review for Well, This Is Exhausting: Essays

  1. 5 out of 5

    David Dittell

    I received a free copy of the book because I am the author's boyfriend. Sophia asked me to tell her what I really think of the book so here I am on Goodreads, making sure her next book doesn't include a chapter on how her accursed, no-good, malicious boyfriend refused to review her first one. This is a very funny and often touching series of personal essays organized around the author's process of self-discovery. It presents the perspective of a now-socially aware woman in her late 20s looking ba I received a free copy of the book because I am the author's boyfriend. Sophia asked me to tell her what I really think of the book so here I am on Goodreads, making sure her next book doesn't include a chapter on how her accursed, no-good, malicious boyfriend refused to review her first one. This is a very funny and often touching series of personal essays organized around the author's process of self-discovery. It presents the perspective of a now-socially aware woman in her late 20s looking back at her childhood, college years, and young adulthood and reflecting on the arc of her personal journeys, lacing together humorous anecdotes with more serious topics such as eating disorders, sexual assault, and racial awareness. Even at its most serious, however, it still finds space for humor in the author's personal experiences and eccentricities (sorry babe!). Like most boyfriends, I mainly read multi-volume history tomes, out of print adventure stories, and comic books that I insist be called "graphic novels," so I am not the best person to place this book in relation to others of its genre (Shrill is the most common comparison I've heard). However, in terms of what I am familiar with, I would positively compare it to the work of David Sedaris as a self-deprecating look back at a unique-yet-relatable life so far. My main experience reading the book was, to be quite honest, of repeatedly laughing out loud, as both the language and the stories being told are rich in humor -- a nice mix of social observation, family absurdism, and millennial doom-and-gloom. I am also not afraid to admit that there were a couple of times I cried at the more deeply personal and heart-wrenching points in later chapters. I don't normally have such major external reactions to reading, so I'd say I was pretty satisfied! It is very possible that my knowing the author has biased me, as I may have background knowledge that deepens the stories for me compared to the average reader, but I would recommend (and have recommended) this book to anyone interested in the humorous personal essays genre, particularly those looking for stories from a young woman's point of view (sorry Sedaris!). I also found it a refreshing and joyful break from my normal boring boyfriend reading, so if you're looking to try something different go right ahead and steal your partner's copy when they aren't looking and have yourself a great read.

  2. 5 out of 5

    Kristen

    The title of this book SUMS IT UP! EXHAUSTING!! The title of this caught my attention, and I was really hoping to read a funny book of life lessons and anecdotes. This is a book of essays chronicling Sophia’s life from teen, Women, to Adult. I liked her rawness, and how she straight up told you how she was. She’s weird, loud, judgmental , has a hard time fitting in, and is a little bit of a fun sponge. She described herself well, I’m am literally using all the same words she did. I did get a goo The title of this book SUMS IT UP! EXHAUSTING!! The title of this caught my attention, and I was really hoping to read a funny book of life lessons and anecdotes. This is a book of essays chronicling Sophia’s life from teen, Women, to Adult. I liked her rawness, and how she straight up told you how she was. She’s weird, loud, judgmental , has a hard time fitting in, and is a little bit of a fun sponge. She described herself well, I’m am literally using all the same words she did. I did get a good chuckle over some of her stories. However, by the time I was halfway through the book, I felt exhausted by reading it, and was ready to call it quits. I literally felt like I couldn’t read another word. The whole book felt like she was right there,talking loud, fast, and shouting at me. Every page was like this. If my eyes could hear they would be deaf! Every story was like that commercial “ CAN YOU HEAR ME NOW”. I felt like I needed a drink and some calming meditation after reading this book!

  3. 4 out of 5

    Brittany (whatbritreads)

    *Shoutout to Gallery Books for sending me an ARC of this book to review!* I feel like I would’ve gotten on with this book better overall if I knew of the author before reading it, because it didn’t seem to interest me as much as I wanted it to. While it starts off somewhat painfully relatable and funny, this quickly just ended up feeling like I was reading an extended tweet. May of the chapters/essays just felt like ramble and I’m not sure what I was supposed to get out of it. It was fine and mos *Shoutout to Gallery Books for sending me an ARC of this book to review!* I feel like I would’ve gotten on with this book better overall if I knew of the author before reading it, because it didn’t seem to interest me as much as I wanted it to. While it starts off somewhat painfully relatable and funny, this quickly just ended up feeling like I was reading an extended tweet. May of the chapters/essays just felt like ramble and I’m not sure what I was supposed to get out of it. It was fine and most of the time somewhat entertaining, but completely immemorable which is a shame. I don’t know what the goal of this book was as it felt like a clear focus wasn’t in place so it ended up really wishy washy. The writing, while witty, snappy and engaging, was pretty repetitive. It felt like every opportunity and every conversation that was had in this book, the author chose to mention ‘cis-gender, able bodied, white, privileged, straight men’. Don’t get me wrong, it’s an important factor to take into account when talking about a lot of inequalities in our society, but you did not need to list out every marker of privilege in every single sentence just to prove that you’re aware of this issue. We got it the first time, after that it just became overkill and really tiring to read. It baffled me especially how she mentioned it despite being a white privileged straight able-bodied woman herself, not really so far from the group she’s chastising constantly. I’m not saying valid points weren’t made in here, just that it ended up making me eyeroll just a bit, I think it could’ve been toned down. We got it. While it also had a couple of discussions on sexism, discrimination and inequality, I learned nothing new from this book. These weren’t original thoughts or ideas – just recycled conversations we’ve been having for years. I just think if you’re going to bring it up, add something new to it. It ended up just being a combination of things I’ve heard before so didn’t overly engage me for the most part. Though it was supposedly a memoir, I feel like I know nothing about this woman or her life still I’m not going to lie to you. It was a fine read and I got through it very quickly, but definitely not life altering in any way. I was predicting to love this more than I did, but it was still alright, and I know the right audience for this is out there and will get a lot more out of it than I did.

  4. 5 out of 5

    Erin

    Giveaway Win!

  5. 4 out of 5

    Camryn

    I really liked this! It made me want to be Sophia’s little sister. I will say I thought it was too long and went on more than it needed to; the earlier essays seemed to be more poignant than the later ones. But I loved how open she was and how much her life mirrored mine; it made me feel less alone.

  6. 4 out of 5

    Readingcaptures

    This is such a terrible memoir. I don't even really know where to start. At first I hoped because she is classified as a comedian perhaps this is a satire or laugh at myself sort of book. It's just irksome how she dismisses casual sex, eating disorders and low self image as a right of passage for women. I mean she talks about using bumble as a way to get sex during high school, and the guy asking and her allowing him to cum on her face. Then goes on about how that made her feel empowered. I shou This is such a terrible memoir. I don't even really know where to start. At first I hoped because she is classified as a comedian perhaps this is a satire or laugh at myself sort of book. It's just irksome how she dismisses casual sex, eating disorders and low self image as a right of passage for women. I mean she talks about using bumble as a way to get sex during high school, and the guy asking and her allowing him to cum on her face. Then goes on about how that made her feel empowered. I should of stopped reading there. Maybe I'm getting old and this is all acceptable stuff now. One thing to help the book is just get rid of all those footnotes at the end of the already very short chapters. It's distracting and annoying. You can afford to add them into the story.

  7. 5 out of 5

    Jenn (burlingtonbibliophagist)

    BOOK REVIEW Well, This is Exhausting by Sophia Benoit Thank you to @simonandschusterca for my early copy in return for an honest review I am usually not one for memoirs, but I am finding I really enjoy essay styled books such as this one. A book I can read at a slower pace full of chapters I can read out of order. Let me start by saying I did not know who Sophia Benoit was when I started reading this. I chose this book solely on the cover, the title and the description. I was looking for a read full BOOK REVIEW Well, This is Exhausting by Sophia Benoit Thank you to @simonandschusterca for my early copy in return for an honest review I am usually not one for memoirs, but I am finding I really enjoy essay styled books such as this one. A book I can read at a slower pace full of chapters I can read out of order. Let me start by saying I did not know who Sophia Benoit was when I started reading this. I chose this book solely on the cover, the title and the description. I was looking for a read full of humour, witty anecdotes, embarrassing childhood memories, sex and self discovery. This book checked all the boxes. Full of laugh out loud moments I was swept away into Sophia’s life. I now understand why she is such a popular comedienne and writer. Chapter titles such as “Sorry Dove, I am Never Going to Learn to Love my Body” and “No, I am Not Doing Zumba With You” grabbed my attention…. Seducing me into reading further to find out why and how it fit? Highly recommend for a lighter read.

  8. 4 out of 5

    Jill Elizabeth

    It really is... Exhausting, that is. I had no idea who Sophia Benoit was before I requested this, but it sounded clever and snarky and I do enjoy essays, particularly those that tackle women's issues in the manner of Jia Tolentino and Roxane Gay, so I thought I would give this one a try. Apparently I'm too old for this particular autho though, because from the beginning I was rolling my eyes and irritated... It felt like whining. It felt like an overabundance of crudity and vulgarity for the sak It really is... Exhausting, that is. I had no idea who Sophia Benoit was before I requested this, but it sounded clever and snarky and I do enjoy essays, particularly those that tackle women's issues in the manner of Jia Tolentino and Roxane Gay, so I thought I would give this one a try. Apparently I'm too old for this particular autho though, because from the beginning I was rolling my eyes and irritated... It felt like whining. It felt like an overabundance of crudity and vulgarity for the sake of attention- getting and shock value. What it didn't feel like was the type of thought- provoking, biting, social-commentary- with-soul I was hoping for... It is entirely probable that I am simply not her demographic, and that was the issue. If you are, and are familiar with her already, or find the twitterverse fascinating, this book may well work for you. But it did nothing at all for me and I gave up on it. Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for my obligation-free review copy.

  9. 4 out of 5

    Krista Mattis

    I’ll be honest here- I didn’t know who Sophia Benoit was before requesting her book. I have never read any of her writing, unless her tweets count. None of that matters- her book is a delight. She appealed to my most insecure self at times, she made me laugh, and she also made me want to be her best friend. I feel like she’s one of the most relatable “famous people” I’ve ever read about. While I bookmarked and highlighted many paragraphs throughout the reading process, a few things stuck out to I’ll be honest here- I didn’t know who Sophia Benoit was before requesting her book. I have never read any of her writing, unless her tweets count. None of that matters- her book is a delight. She appealed to my most insecure self at times, she made me laugh, and she also made me want to be her best friend. I feel like she’s one of the most relatable “famous people” I’ve ever read about. While I bookmarked and highlighted many paragraphs throughout the reading process, a few things stuck out to me that will also shed some light on what you can expect if and when you pick this up: “Good cinematography can make even the shittiest things look artistic.” “An under-talked-about truth is that most friend groups past the age of like twelve revolved around people being attracted to one another.” “Deodorant also works great under your boobs.” “Learn how to make three signature dishes. A side, a dessert, and a showstopper that really impresses.” I could go on, but you need to pick this up and learn for yourself! You don’t need to know Sophia to enjoy her writing. Her goal was to give us moments where we could relate to her life thus far, and I think she achieved it. Thank you to NetGalley and Simon & Schuster Canada for the advanced eARC of this book!

  10. 5 out of 5

    Hannah Cernicky

    I liked the cover and I liked the little blurb but I had not heard of the author, and I was not prepared. I pride myself on not being shocked by much, having read and lived a variety of experiences however, this coming of age/adulthood memoir essential dug up any traumatic growing up memories I have that I thought were buried deep enough. Heres the straight up 🫖 : it is extremely vulgar, crass, and inappropriate, and I had second hand embarrassment reading it…. And probably first hand embarrassme I liked the cover and I liked the little blurb but I had not heard of the author, and I was not prepared. I pride myself on not being shocked by much, having read and lived a variety of experiences however, this coming of age/adulthood memoir essential dug up any traumatic growing up memories I have that I thought were buried deep enough. Heres the straight up 🫖 : it is extremely vulgar, crass, and inappropriate, and I had second hand embarrassment reading it…. And probably first hand embarrassment because although as much as I wish these stories and truth she shares weren’t believable, they are and I relate too much to save my dignity at this point. If you pick this up, be extremely prepared to feel naked with some raw second day sunburn skin with an itchy tag on a shirt rubbing too much. This book reminds me how HARD growing up is. How awkward and disappointing, reconciling what you thought growing up would be like and what its actually like. I feel that I am still in the midst of that situation, with the scales slowly peeling off my eyeballs, and nothing is as shiny as I thought, but most things aren’t as bad either. Except looking back to 15-21 year old experiences as now 26 year old. That is just plain tough. Sophia is a GQ sex column writer, which I found out shortly after starting and then upon what I immediately read in the first chapter googling what kind of psycho would right this stuff after a dedication to her parents… but something weird happened in that I couldn’t put it down… She writes with humor, sarcasm, dramatic commentary on her own writing that I find hil-ar-i-ous after an initial full body cringe. “I thought I would grow up to be the kind of adult that could go to Target and buy whatever she wanted without readjusting the budget.” Didn’t we all. She talks explicitly about how she didn’t fit in and the ways she attempted to, and although its slightly extreme, it is so horrifyingly relatable. Actually, I think those last two words sum up the whole book.

  11. 4 out of 5

    Brynn | readyourworriesaway

    Thank you @gallerybooks for the gifted copy! Sophia Benoit, GQ columnist and Twitter sensation, brings you a laugh-out-loud memoir written in essays. Well, This Is Exhausting explores feminism, eating disorders, race, double standards — nothing is off limits. Sophia recalls her youth, delving into how hard it was to fit in, struggling with body image, and what it was like growing up with divorced parents. She also details her journey through college and her adult years. Knowing she is a comedian Thank you @gallerybooks for the gifted copy! Sophia Benoit, GQ columnist and Twitter sensation, brings you a laugh-out-loud memoir written in essays. Well, This Is Exhausting explores feminism, eating disorders, race, double standards — nothing is off limits. Sophia recalls her youth, delving into how hard it was to fit in, struggling with body image, and what it was like growing up with divorced parents. She also details her journey through college and her adult years. Knowing she is a comedian makes total sense because of the way she effortlessly slipped in jokes and-one liners throughout the story. So many of the topics Sophia touched on were relatable. She was able to delve into these topics in ways that pushed me to think deeper about my own experiences. I loved her ability to reflect on what she had gone through and identify both her own mistakes and the wrongdoings of others, or just society as a whole.

  12. 4 out of 5

    Becky Roth

    My opinion on this book changed radically from beginning to end. The author’s life has been a bit basic, no offense. But for being ripe ole age of 29, she did a good job with what she had to work with. The first half is very relatable and pretty much about growing up in the quiet midwest and then moving to LA for college. But then I got to the second half and that’s where Sophia shines. Her perspectives on privilege, being an ally and how to advocate for change are well articulated, insightful a My opinion on this book changed radically from beginning to end. The author’s life has been a bit basic, no offense. But for being ripe ole age of 29, she did a good job with what she had to work with. The first half is very relatable and pretty much about growing up in the quiet midwest and then moving to LA for college. But then I got to the second half and that’s where Sophia shines. Her perspectives on privilege, being an ally and how to advocate for change are well articulated, insightful and poignant. Overall, the essays were humorous and well written. Even though I had no idea who the author was, I really enjoyed it. And by the end, I’d recommended - and I also really want a dude to sit around watching me read a romance novel to even out all the time I’ve spent watching them play video games. Big thanks to the publisher and #NetGalley for the ARC.

  13. 4 out of 5

    B.

    I won an ARC of this one in a goodreads giveaway - unfortunately. What's "exhausting" is trying to read this book. Let's start with the audience alienation in the introduction - book readers aren't losers, honey, they're your target audience. Second off - holy crap is this woman abrasive, vile, and crass. If the author talks the same way she writes essays? This is the type of person I would feign sickness to get out of talking to. And if that didn't work? I'd make myself puke on her shoes just t I won an ARC of this one in a goodreads giveaway - unfortunately. What's "exhausting" is trying to read this book. Let's start with the audience alienation in the introduction - book readers aren't losers, honey, they're your target audience. Second off - holy crap is this woman abrasive, vile, and crass. If the author talks the same way she writes essays? This is the type of person I would feign sickness to get out of talking to. And if that didn't work? I'd make myself puke on her shoes just to get away from her. That's right - self-initiated vomiting would be better than talking to someone who talks the way these essays are written. This is nothing to be proud of and there's nothing here worth reading.

  14. 5 out of 5

    Jill Terry

    I FELT SEEN. That is the best way I can describe my emotion while reading the essay collection. I think Sophia Benoit perfectly captures the young adult/millenial experience. From late blooming with boys to becomeing an informed adult, I saw myself in her experiences. The essay collection made me feel less alone in my own emotions. Definitely recommend to anyone in thei rearly adulthood!

  15. 5 out of 5

    Laurel Kathleen

    I loved this book so much I finished it in 2 days. There were so many insightful sections that made me shout "YES!". This author has such a wonderful way of verbalizing ideas that many of us might have been thinking, but can't always put into words. There were also a lot of sections that made me say "oof, me too" which is a hard but necessary realization, specifically in the sections about past roles within/future roles dismantling the ever-present and insanely oppressive patriarchy. I loved this book so much I finished it in 2 days. There were so many insightful sections that made me shout "YES!". This author has such a wonderful way of verbalizing ideas that many of us might have been thinking, but can't always put into words. There were also a lot of sections that made me say "oof, me too" which is a hard but necessary realization, specifically in the sections about past roles within/future roles dismantling the ever-present and insanely oppressive patriarchy.

  16. 5 out of 5

    Danielle

    I won this ARC as a goodreads giveaway! A very honest and funny set of essays. Her topics and humor is very relatable and she is self aware of her privilege (although at times she brings it up too much). Overall a good read from a strong writer.

  17. 4 out of 5

    Genevieve Trono

    When I saw the title of this book, I knew I needed to read it. I love essay collections and especially enjoy how easy they are to take in in small doses, which is how my reading has been so far this summer…⁣ ⁣This book is a memoir essay mix, which is shared through a humorous confessional type style of writing mixed with some seriously relevant 21st-century social commentary. ⁣ ⁣ I connected with some essays more than others, which is about how it goes with this style of book but this little snippe When I saw the title of this book, I knew I needed to read it. I love essay collections and especially enjoy how easy they are to take in in small doses, which is how my reading has been so far this summer…⁣ ⁣This book is a memoir essay mix, which is shared through a humorous confessional type style of writing mixed with some seriously relevant 21st-century social commentary. ⁣ ⁣ I connected with some essays more than others, which is about how it goes with this style of book but this little snippet really sums it up...⁣ ⁣ “We all have a story about figuring out who we want to be and how we want to behave and treat other people, and often in other people’s stories we recognize ourselves. We read something and go, “Ahhh yep yep yep. That’s it; that’s what it’s like to be alive sometimes.” -Sophia Benoit, Author⁣ Thank you to Gallery Books for my gifted copy.

  18. 5 out of 5

    smalltownbookmom

    3.5 - An incredibly raw and no holds bar series of essays about modern womanhood, sexism and gender inequalities. I was hoping to love this more and while I did agree with a lot of what Sophia had to say, I wasn't the biggest fan of how she said a lot of it. This one just wasn't a hit for me > probably more geared towards younger, single women. A very sex and body positive book that addresses the author's own biases, privileges and her struggles with body dysmorphia. Favorite quotes: "Intelligent 3.5 - An incredibly raw and no holds bar series of essays about modern womanhood, sexism and gender inequalities. I was hoping to love this more and while I did agree with a lot of what Sophia had to say, I wasn't the biggest fan of how she said a lot of it. This one just wasn't a hit for me > probably more geared towards younger, single women. A very sex and body positive book that addresses the author's own biases, privileges and her struggles with body dysmorphia. Favorite quotes: "Intelligent women constantly have to prove themselves." "...to enjoy something feminine is to admit weakness." "There is a truth universally acknowledged that men are constantly thinking about sex and not just thinking about it but actively seeking it out. Well guess what society, ladies are horny too but that's not something we're supposed to talk about."

  19. 5 out of 5

    Marina Watts

    I LOVED IT. I was excited when I heard Sophia Benoit was writing a book but was blown away but how much I enjoyed “Well, This Is Exhausting.” An entire chapter dedicated to getting ready to go out resonated with me, and she’s right. These are truly some of the best nights you’ll have. Overall, this book was an absolute delight and I was sad that it finally came to a close. Sophia, if you’re ever in NY I’d love to grab some champagne and chat (in a not creepy way!).

  20. 4 out of 5

    Hannah Cernicky

    I got this as an e-Arc from Netgalley which makes me feel very cool and legit. Thank you!!! I liked the cover and I liked the little blurb but I had not heard of the author, and I was not prepared. I pride myself on not being shocked by much, having read and lived a variety of experiences however, this coming of age/adulthood memoir essential dug up any traumatic growing up memories I have that I thought were buried deep enough. Heres the straight up 🫖 :  it is extremely vulgar, crass, and inappro I got this as an e-Arc from Netgalley which makes me feel very cool and legit. Thank you!!! I liked the cover and I liked the little blurb but I had not heard of the author, and I was not prepared. I pride myself on not being shocked by much, having read and lived a variety of experiences however, this coming of age/adulthood memoir essential dug up any traumatic growing up memories I have that I thought were buried deep enough. Heres the straight up 🫖 :  it is extremely vulgar, crass, and inappropriate, and I had second hand embarrassment reading it…. And probably first hand embarrassment because although as much as I wish these stories and truth she shares werent believable, they are and I relate too much to save my dignity at this point. If you pick this up, be extremely prepared to feel naked with some raw second day sunburn skin with an itchy tag on a shirt rubbing too much. This book reminds me how HARD growing up is. How awkward and disappointing, reconciling what you thought growing up would be like and what its actually like. I feel that I am still in the midst of that situation, with the scales slowly peeling off my eyeballs, and nothing is as shiny as I thought, but most things aren’t as bad either. Except looking back to 15-21 year old experiences as now 26 year old. That is just plain tough. Sophia is a GQ sex column writer, which I found out shortly after starting and then upon what I immediately read in the first chapter googling what kind of psycho would right this stuff after a dedication to her parents… but something weird happened in that I couldn’t put it down… She writes with humor, sarcasm, dramatic commentary on her own writing that I find HILARIOUS after an initial full body cringe. “I thought I would grow up to be the kind of adult that could go to Target and buy whatever she wanted without readjusting the budget.” Didn’t we all. She talks explicitly about how she didn’t fit in and the ways she attempted to, and although its slightly extreme, it is so horrifyingly relatable. Actually, I think those last two words sum up the whole book.

  21. 5 out of 5

    Anne Logan

    I’m finding myself drawn to collections of essays more and more as I get older. Perhaps it’s because I have less time on my hands, so reading self-contained chapters is more rewarding, or maybe it’s because I’m just curious about other people’s perspectives, and an essay is the perfect way to dive quickly into someone else’s psyche and give it a quick go. I know I’m not the only one; celebrity-authored essays are a growing genre that many publishers are focusing on, and I recently discovered one I’m finding myself drawn to collections of essays more and more as I get older. Perhaps it’s because I have less time on my hands, so reading self-contained chapters is more rewarding, or maybe it’s because I’m just curious about other people’s perspectives, and an essay is the perfect way to dive quickly into someone else’s psyche and give it a quick go. I know I’m not the only one; celebrity-authored essays are a growing genre that many publishers are focusing on, and I recently discovered one of my new favourite writers, Samantha Irby through her latest book of essays. Like Irby, Sophia Benoit has a huge following on twitter and is known for her humour, so it comes as no surprise I find her writing hilarious too Well, This is Exhausting is Benoit’s first book, but it will no doubt be her first in a long line of books, she’s got a lot to say, and I’m more than willing to listen (read). Book Summary Benoit’s essays generally follow a loose timeline from her childhood to present day. I’m not sure how old she is now (I’ll guess late twenties to early thirties) but the majority of her essays focus on her time in college, which seemed to have been a formative time for her. She limits her subject matter to experiences she herself had, or women her age have had. She readily admits she is still learning about the different facets of feminism, and how to be a better ally for those in our society who are pushed to the margins (LGTBQ, people with disabilities, etc.) while also stating the challenges of living in the world as a white, cis, woman, arguably a position of privilege especially when living in a first world country. While she tackles these bigger subjects, she also revels in the silliness that being a young woman offers, like putting on make-up and drinking with friends before going to a club or bar. Some essays are quite vulnerable; she struggled with her weight growing up and fluctuated between various eating disorders as she entered college. The way she viewed her own self-worth in relation to the male attention she received in her earlier years is heartbreaking, but it seems she has moved past this dependence on external validation. Each essay is centered on a personal anecdote or situation, and acts as a jumping off point to her thoughts and feelings on wider society. My Thoughts When I finished the first few pages of this book, I was worried I would grow tired of Benoit’s voice. She is constantly cracking jokes, and includes lots of italicized words, exclamation marks, and asides. Her tone is very conversational, it reads like she is telling us a story and she’s anticipating our reactions and responding to them in real time. And yes, I am completely aware of the fact that I write in the exact same style!I’m happy to read this kind of writing in shorter spurts, but a whole book of it made me nervous. Despite my hesitance, I kept on, and was rewarded by her thoughtful yet still entertaining observations, all mixed in with jokes about her struggles with dating and her overly-emotional family. She is hard on herself and doesn’t hesitate to point out the toxic way of thinking that led her through her college years, but it’s clear she has done a lot of self-analysis to have the ability to recognize how self-destructive she was back then. By the end of the book I grew to love her unique voice, and days after finishing the book her phrases are still bouncing in the back of my head, and I find myself laughing at little things I’m doing or thinking because I know it’s something Benoit would easily make a joke out of. I’m noticing a new trend that is shining through women’s non-fiction writing, and that is the explicit acknowledgement of privilege, plus the pointing out of those who do not have it. Compared to the male writers I’ve read recently, white women seem to have no issues with identifying the systems that hold them up, while these same systems to do not benefit every single woman either. For instance, the BIPOC population still struggle to gain the same footing we white women have enjoyed for longer (thought not as long as men, let’s be honest here). This is a welcome distinction for me, because while I don’t consider myself a victim, and haven’t met many women who do, I think it’s important we acknowledge how we can still improve things to create a better and more equal world for everyone. We need to identify that things aren’t perfect before anyone makes an effort to change it, and this is exactly what Benoit is doing. She doesn’t feel sorry for herself and and she’s making jokes about her situations more often than bemoaning the – but she also doesn’t shy away from talking about her experience of sexual assault and the fact that it’s so prevalent that women have been conditioned to question whether they encouraged it before it happened to them. Some may find the transitions difficult to follow, but I appreciated her efforts to be funny while she discussed serious subjects, it provided a pleasing balance that made the book to fun pick up no matter which essay I was diving into next. To read the rest of my reviews, please visit my blog: https://ivereadthis.com/ Sign up for my newsletter here: https://ivereadthis.com/subscribe/ Or follow me on social media! Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/Ivereadthis/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/ivereadthisblog Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ivereadthis YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCD6E...

  22. 4 out of 5

    BookTrib.com

    GQ columnist and stand-up comedian Sophia Benoit is that rare combo of wisecracking friend and tough older sister in WELL, THIS IS EXHAUSTING. Benoit is able to give advice because she’s done most of the things she is telling her audience not to do. Some of her stories are excruciatingly funny, and some are just excruciating, but her underlying message is one of personal empowerment. Read our full review here: https://booktrib.com/2021/07/13/gq-co... GQ columnist and stand-up comedian Sophia Benoit is that rare combo of wisecracking friend and tough older sister in WELL, THIS IS EXHAUSTING. Benoit is able to give advice because she’s done most of the things she is telling her audience not to do. Some of her stories are excruciatingly funny, and some are just excruciating, but her underlying message is one of personal empowerment. Read our full review here: https://booktrib.com/2021/07/13/gq-co...

  23. 5 out of 5

    H

    I loved a few of the essays at the beginning of the book. I am about ten years further out from high school/college than the author and it feels like such a long ago blip that reading long chapters about average experiences feels tedious. I would love to have seen this book marinate for another couple of years, esp since I have always felt the exact same way about Grease. Also, and I am TOTALLY okay with this, but the cover page looks like a tampon at a glance! It gets me every time!

  24. 4 out of 5

    Latisha Bechkos

    Thank you to Simon & schuster for the ARC! This book was so boring. I got nothing from it. Wish I had more to say, but I had so much trouble getting through majority of it. Nothing was very interesting and I didn’t see the point in many of the chapters - one was essentially just her reviewing her favourite movies?? I did enjoy the chapter that was advice to her sisters, but ended up giving up and DNFing this.

  25. 5 out of 5

    HQ

    i tried my best but blaaaaaaah i skimmed through the last 1/3

  26. 5 out of 5

    Lisa Konet

    It really was exhausting (and disappointing) reading this collection of essays. I have never heard of Sophia Benoit before because I do not use twitter, I stopped four years ago because there was no point to it. ANYWAYS, THIS BOOK was exhausting because it touching on important feminist issues and i did not mind mind the bad/foul language throughout,; HOWEVER, all the essays seemed like a complaint and I felt myself not caring what Benoit was writing about. FYI TO Benoit- the reader needs to car It really was exhausting (and disappointing) reading this collection of essays. I have never heard of Sophia Benoit before because I do not use twitter, I stopped four years ago because there was no point to it. ANYWAYS, THIS BOOK was exhausting because it touching on important feminist issues and i did not mind mind the bad/foul language throughout,; HOWEVER, all the essays seemed like a complaint and I felt myself not caring what Benoit was writing about. FYI TO Benoit- the reader needs to care and/or relate to what you have written. Honestly, I read some of these and skimmed through the others. Not what I expected and not funny. Disappointing and disappointed. Cannot recommend and would not read from this author in the future. Thanks to Netgalley, Sophia Benoit and Gallery Books for an ARC in exchange for an honest review. Available: 7/13/21

  27. 4 out of 5

    Minna

    This is a memoir in essays by Twitter power-player, Sophia Benoit, 28. She speaks in a chatty pop-culture and profanity laden voice only people from her generation can appreciate. Or can they? Benoit’s style is slap-dash and not thoughtful enough for me. It’s filled with cringy personal details and irrelevant info like crushes kindergarten through high school: Not even celebrities, just random kids. My conjecture; the publisher offered Benoit a tidy sum and this book fulfills the contractual obli This is a memoir in essays by Twitter power-player, Sophia Benoit, 28. She speaks in a chatty pop-culture and profanity laden voice only people from her generation can appreciate. Or can they? Benoit’s style is slap-dash and not thoughtful enough for me. It’s filled with cringy personal details and irrelevant info like crushes kindergarten through high school: Not even celebrities, just random kids. My conjecture; the publisher offered Benoit a tidy sum and this book fulfills the contractual obligation. Cynical, I know. Nothing groundbreaking as far as ideas or new conversations here. The titles of the chapters garner a chuckle, but this Twitter crossover is a hard pass.

  28. 5 out of 5

    Natalie Sanchez

    This book is a memoir, written by the GQ advise columnist and Twitter personality Sophia Benoit. I’m not much of a magazine reader, nor do I have a Twitter. But, the description of this book really intrigued me! Sophia writes about the struggle to do the “right” thing—to make others comfortable, to take minimal and calculated risks, to live up to society’s expectations—only to realize that there was so little payoff. She talks about her journey from being a good girl, to a proud feminist. She sp This book is a memoir, written by the GQ advise columnist and Twitter personality Sophia Benoit. I’m not much of a magazine reader, nor do I have a Twitter. But, the description of this book really intrigued me! Sophia writes about the struggle to do the “right” thing—to make others comfortable, to take minimal and calculated risks, to live up to society’s expectations—only to realize that there was so little payoff. She talks about her journey from being a good girl, to a proud feminist. She speaks with no filter (which I can appreciate), she lays everything bare for you, the good and the bad decisions she’s made throughout her life. Sophia’s memoir is HILARIOUS, raw, and relatable and I loved it! I’ve lost count of how many times she mentions the word titties. This might be the funniest book I’ve read in a loooong time, considering I tend to gravitate towards books with sad and depressing tropes. Honestly, she is me and I was her growing up and transitioning into adulthood. A few things I didn’t find enjoyable was the footnotes and annotations.. I ended up just skipping them altogether. I loved all her side remarks and comments, I just wish she would have put them in the chapter instead of adding them into the footnotes. Other than that I completely enjoyed this book, I would recommend it to all of my friends who would benefit from some funny feminist thought.

  29. 5 out of 5

    Bitch With The Book

    I absolutely LOVED this bad bitch manual. A lot of the essays have a “letter to my younger self” vibes and I felt like I really connected to so many. It was humorous, insightful, and conversational without the fluffy bullshit you may get from others that are similar to this book style. This book was a great shakeup to my normal reading routine and I will be buying a physical copy to read for years to come.

  30. 5 out of 5

    Cleo Harper

    Essay collections are hit or miss for me, and this missed the mark for me. I didn't connect with the writing style, which was disappointing because I really wanted to enjoy the author's stories of growing and learning. As well, reading footnotes in an ebook is not easy, and going back and forth between the end of the chapters and where the footnote was placed became tedious. *ARC provided by Netgalley for review* Essay collections are hit or miss for me, and this missed the mark for me. I didn't connect with the writing style, which was disappointing because I really wanted to enjoy the author's stories of growing and learning. As well, reading footnotes in an ebook is not easy, and going back and forth between the end of the chapters and where the footnote was placed became tedious. *ARC provided by Netgalley for review*

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